Dear Heidi,
I wanted to like you. I just thought you were naive and vulnerable and silly. But then I saw you walking down the street on last night's episode, dressed in a horrible spandex number that I'm pretty sure made an appearance in Pretty Woman. Your shoes were high and spiky, platformy and shiny. Your poor lips were collagen-injected so they looked like a duck's bill. Consider this an intervention: I can't do anything for you until your ready to admit you have a problem. You're starting to look like the love child of Dinah Lohan and Jenna Jameson. Please get help.
Best,
That Girl
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